Meats Be Gone | Veggies and fruit are our dear friends.

raw(r)

A couple weeks ago I bought Ani’s Raw Food Kitchen, because we are eating a lot of salads on E2L and aren’t salads really just raw food. Plus Dr. Fuhrman’s desserts leave A LOT to be desired and I thought the raw foodists might have some better ideas for me and they should automatically not contain sugar or flour.

Usually, the thick aura of pseudoscientific bullshit surrounding the raw foods movement makes my head explode. This book is no exception. It is liberally peppered with crazy rants on the pages in between the recipes. Some are in light green boxes and some are in dark green boxes and some are not and it makes no sense and has no organization and generates an air of wackiness that irritates me. Plus the rants are crazy. She literally says “Some folks worry about how eating fats affects their weight… The more fats we eat, the more our body lets go of fats, because it knows more will be coming in.” I cannot express to you the extent to which this statement makes my head explode and the sheer craziness of allowing someone to write things like this in a paper book that you can buy in a real store. I understand the point, but I think the point is really more that if the bulk of your diet is raw then it is all very low calorie so you can eat much more fat than would otherwise be okay. But STILL.

Also there is a section on dog foods and let us pretend for a moment that I do not object to the financial investment that would be involved in feeding Lenny two cups of raw nuts per day. On one page it says that her dog “loves whole fresh food. On her own in nature, that’s what she’d be eating.” On the facing page it says that the dog’s favorite food is durian. Are you kidding me. On his own in nature, Lenny would be eating big mac wrappers and rotten old squirrel carcasses and as many poops as he could find. Durian! Her dog does look healthy though. This is where the nine thousand vanity photos in the book come in handy, there are opportunities to scrutinize the dog from every angle. You can scrutinize Ani Phyo from every angle as well since there are ten thousand pictures of her for no reason. I think you can tell how it is from the google preview of the book. It is like the preview times one hundred. Actually this didn’t bother me because after reading some of the crazy, crazy soup recipes that have 1.5 cups of olive oil for 4 servings I sort of wanted to examine whether she is oozing greasiness from her face or anything. (Appears not.)

And this is nitpicky but there is no reason to spell “milk” as “mylk.” Soy milk is milk and coconut milk is milk. We are all grown womyn here and we can handle the word “milk.”

So after all that complaining, Chris and O and I both really liked the two things I have made from this book so far. The Eat to Live food is very light and vegetabley so it was really good to eat something rich and dense. The raw food way is very heavy on nuts, seeds, and oil, which I did not realize, so I was a little apprehensive about making these things because the calories are a lot higher than any straight-up E2L recipe but we have gobbled them down like little nut piglets and nothing happened to our fatness levels. The first thing I made was a “save-the-tuna” wrap.

4392187801_c8b9b8da8aAh, I remember my horror when wraps started to get popular and I could not understand why you would want to eat a sandwich without real bread and now look how I am using a collard leaf. Anyway you can find the recipe for this if you google. It is made from sunflower seeds which are soaked in filtered water for 8 hours, which is apparently how all nuts and seeds should be prepared. The whole soaking thing is odd to me. Presumably they are supposed to germinate and become “living foods” which are better to eat. But what if I buy cashew pieces instead of whole cashews? They are cheaper. Then they turn into living pieces? Like zombie nuts? Anyway we liked this a lot.

Then I made these nice donut hole things.

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The recipe is on youtube, although I didn’t do anything by hand because my dried pineapple was hard as a rock and uncuttable by knives so I ground up everything in the food processor. It was pretty exciting to put each pineapple piece in and hear it make a noise like the whole kitchen was about to explode. Anyway I also added some cinnamon. We ate these all in 24 hours but we didn’t get fatter the way we get fatter when we accidentally eat a Chipotle burrito. I think even regulars would like them.

So now I am getting sucked into raw foodism even though it makes my head explode. I was literally shopping for dehydrators (”dehydrators are electrical sunshine simulators”) on amazon until I remembered that I don’t even believe this craziness about the magic 105 degrees above-which-food-loses-all-nutrients and how if I want a cracker I can make one in the damn oven.

I’m going to make this fake cake tonight:

nothing like a cold salad in a blizzard

Well we are almost at the end of our 6 weeks on ETL but towards the end I started cheating with peanut butter and Wegmans sourdough multigrain bread so I think I only lost about 7 lbs. It’s hard to tell because there is a roller coaster of bloats from eating no salt and then eating something accidentally salty. I also noticed that, after basically giving up wheat for four weeks, now when I eat bread or whole wheat pasta I feel just AWFUL afterward. I hope this is just psychological because the only thing more annoying than a vegan is a gluten-free vegan. Other than a raw gluten-free vegan. I think my skin looks a lot better though. And grocery shopping is much easier since you basically just go to the produce section. I guess we will continue after this weekend, because we are going to the Great Sage Valentines Day dinner as long as it stops blizzarding. The blizzard has not been so bad since I have not had to go to work for three days but there was one day of terror when we ran out of lettuce. I have never before used up a whole tub of Costco spring mix before it got slimy but now we do it in two days.

falafel

ETL things that are good:

  • Lightened-Up Falafels from The Everyday Vegan by Dreena Burton
  • sauteed portabello mushrooms on salad
  • a medjool date cut in half and the seed hole filled with peanut butter (not technically allowed)
  • New England Clam-less Chowder by Nava Atlas (this is REALLY good but you have to eliminate the oil and count it as a starch and it probably has too much salt from the baked tofu)
  • Red Lentil Artichoke Stew from The Vegan Table (p. 70) with quinoa and steamed kale
  • fake ice cream made with frozen fruit and a banana and some soy milk in the food processor or especially with frozen cherries and cocoa powder
  • Fuhrman’s orange-sesame salad dressing (6 cashews, 2 T toasted sesame seeds, 1/2 c orange juice, and some rice vinegar, blended in the blender)

ETL things that are NOT good:

  • Fuhrman’s black bean brownies (a good texture but not sweet at all and not chocolatey; perhaps could be rescued by adding banana and more cocoa powder; also can be partially rescued by putting peanut butter on top (not allowed).)
  • basically all the desserts besides fruit-in-the-food-processor. Maybe this is on purpose so you shut up about dessert and eat some damn fruit instead.

beans and beans and bananas

Okay, I think I am getting the hang of cooking non-icky Eat to Live food. The trick is basically to not cook any recipe that was ever submitted to a mailing list.

This is the best dinner from last week. It looks ugly but it was good.

cheezeIt is Nacho Cheese-ish Substance on roasted vegetables. The cheese sauce is not like cheese and not even as cheese-like as most of the other fake cheese sauces I have tried, but it made of only ETL ingredients (white beans, salsa, lemon juice, nutritional yeast, onion powder) and if you appreciate that then it is pretty good. It is kind of like tangy hummus. I’m not sure how I feel about its use in a mexican pie, where you put it on top of beans, so it is pureed beans on top of beans. I have not been brainwashed enough for that yet. And it turns out you can spray a tiny bit of olive oil on vegetables with one of those atomizer things instead of giving them a severe dousing and they roast just fine. I did one tray of cauliflower, broccoli, carrots, and brussels sprouts and one of onions, bell pepper, mushrooms and zucchini. Before I was too lazy to cook more than one vegetable at a time so it is exciting to have so many.

Today we had taco salad (+ cilantro) for lunch and it was the first meal that I liked so much that I wanted to eat it again. There are not very many recipes that I make more than once in general though.

tacosaladAnd can I tell you how amazing the pressure cooker is. Oh the freedom from the tyranny of canned beans and also the tyranny of having to soak dried beans way ahead of time and then boiling them for hours and they are still hard forever! The only price to pay is a slight fear of a giant steamy explosion whenever it makes a weird noise. That seems to be wearing off though.

For dinner I made a soup that was sort of like Moosewood minestrone with random healthful things added.

DSC_0019Mollie Katzen is apparently all about eating meats now, which is just another reason the dislike Moosewood Restaurant along with how they are always serving fishes and also how it is not good. Believe me, I lived in Ithaca and both times I ate there everything was bland and either over- or under-cooked.

Mollie Katzen: I’ve never been that committed to vegetarianism. There is a difference between eating vegetarian and vegetarianism. I love vegetarian food. One of my favorite things is a big plateful of vegetables and greens with tofu and nuts. That is how I eat about 95% of the time. However, if I’m feeling like I have low blood sugar and I’ve got a long day ahead of me and I am at a lunch meeting and the two different sandwich choices are grilled eggplant or roast beef, I am going to go for the roast beef. This is because if I eat the eggplant, I am going to get faint and dizzy and crash in an hour because I need the protein. So I need to go for the most nutritionally dense food available. I’m also slight and thin and I don’t have a lot of reserve, so I am very conscious of the nutritional density of food. Of course I want it to be pure and I want it to be wholesome and healthy as well.

Poor little thing! Maybe you should put some almonds in your pocket, you dummy. Anyway you don’t need protein, you’re just detoxing.

Nonetheless I do make the minestrone and ratatouille recipes from the original cookbook a lot.

This time I changed it a bit because noooo pasta.

tiny bit olive oil
1 onion, chopped
3 cloves crushed garlic
1 cup celery — minced
1 cup carrot — cubed
1 cup eggplant — cubed
2 small zucchini, cubed
1 green bell pepper, chopped
3 large leaves of kale, ribs removed, chopped
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1 teaspoon oregano
1/2 cup fresh parsley — chopped
some basil
2 cups cooked great northern beans
28 oz can crushed tomatoes in puree
1/2 cup dry quinoa
3 1/2 cups water or stock
3 tablespoons dry red wine

In a soup kettle, saute garlic and onions in olive oil until they are soft and translucent.
Add carrot, celery and eggplant.
Mix well.
Add oregano, black pepper and basil.
Cover and cook over low heat 5-8 minutes.

Add zucchini, green pepper, kale, quinoa, water, puree, cooked beans and wine.

Cover and simmer until quinoa is cooked, ~20 minutes.
Add parsley.

One thing I think I am not doing quite right is that I have been eating a crap ton of bananas. The banana is not doing well on the hallowed nutrient density chart. In fact it is worse than skim milk and shrimps! I could just be eating milky shrimps every day! So I’m going to work on my banana habit. So I made Dr. Fuhrman’s YUMMY BANANA OAT BARS

bars

I added some cinnamon, pumpkin pie spice, and a little bit of agave nectar instead of the date sugar but still I’m gonna say that maybe “yummy” is a bit of an overstatement. Because it’s not like you bite into it and you think “mmmm, yummy!” as happens with traditional desserts. It’s more like “this is not so bad, hey this is kind of good in a way, oh god what has happened to me, this is not a real cookie but it is sort of yummy because I have not had anything cookie-like in so so long.” It is pretty good to have one with a cup of tea. Of course you are not supposed to have tea so I did not have tea, just like I did not have a hanger episode that led to eating an entire 1000 calorie chipotle burrito yesterday. (It was waaaay too salty.) (Hence no weight numbers today.) (Due to the bloats.)

i went on vacation, i ate some junk, i gained 2 lbs

We went out of town this past weekend and I had really good intentions and I purposely got a hotel room with a fridge and microwave and brought a giant tub of lettuce and some stuff to make healthful burritos. It worked for the first day and a half.

DSC_0004I brought a tupperware of sauteed onions and peppers and a can of refried beans and some whole wheat tortillas and a jar of salsa and it worked quite well. And I brought fruit and oatmeal for breakfast. But then there was a Harris Teeter next to the hotel and they have these really good vegan cookies and I started to have a little fit about how I am not that fat and can I not have a cup of tea and a cookie once in a while goddammit. Then we ate all the cookies and then we had a black bean burger at a local health food store and then we had a hundred soy lattes and then I had vegan fish tacos in Norfolk on the way home because I never have a chance to have vegan fish tacos where we live. Oh then we had pancakes when we got home because it was so much driving that the prospect of pancakes was the only thing that made me not drive off the road. We also walked a million miles though so maybe my two pounds is just water weight from the unaccustomed huge amounts of salt, right.

Well today we are back on track.

Breakfast: 1 cup oatmeal + 1 Tbs ground flaxseed with big pile of unfrozen berries and cinnamon; 1 cup coffee with soymilk

Lunch: salad bar at work, as always

banana

Dinner: salad, pile of broccoli, small sweet potato, black-eyed peas with tomato sauce/onion/pepper/celery

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things are looking up! in case you were worried

I guess I could be characterized as a “critical” or “nitpicky” person. So it is amazing that in all of the Eat to Live book there is only one thing that I think is really crazy. Well there are two things, but one thing is how Dr. Fuhrman says that people who get shakey and low-blood-sugary when they don’t eat are not really dangerously hypoglycemic, but just detoxing from whatever animal-protein laden junk they just ate. I definitely get hangry to the extent where my psyche has a melt-down and I cannot do anything but act crazy and irrational, not even find a food item and eat it. For this reason I never go anywhere without a Luna bar. Anyway, *I* am not detoxing from animal bits. But I guess I could be detoxing from my previous Luna bar. So I’m refraining from final judgment on this one until the 6-week trial is over. It would be worth it to follow this diet forever for the sole reason of curing my hanger episodes. I think Chris O would like that too.

The second thing is luckily part of the google books preview so then I am not really violating copyright to show it to you, right. Now, Dr. Fuhrman is not at all dumb, and he is a reasonable writer. My finicky scientist brain had no problem with any of the chapters about sciencey things, not even the one that I believe is titled “I am The Greatest Doctor There Ever Was” or something like that. (Okay, sometimes he repeats the same exact sentence within the same page, but that just makes me wonder where the crap the editor was. Then I give him the benefit of the doubt; he is probably just repeating himself to hammer home his point to all the dummies.) BUT I really am not so sure about the recipes. For an example:

fuhr1 copySo, to summarize, that is liquified tuna fish, to be used as a dressing. (There is a nonvegetarian option to the diet. The idea is that if you cannot give up the flavor of meat, you should season your food with it rather than eating a giant hunk of meat. The recipe is a pretty direct practical application of this idea. But HELLO, yuck. I guess the cats would like it.)

That’s not even the crazy thing, this is it, it is part of a soup recipe:

fuhr2 copyOk, WHAT? Who is this doctor? Isn’t there something not legal about selling soup as a cure for cancer? Does this “doctor” travel around the country a hundred years ago? This paragraph has been on a loop in my brain since last Friday: it must be a joke – but it’s not really funny – but isn’t that illegal? – it must be a joke… Dr. Fuhrman, I know you google yourself and respond to crazy people on their pro-Atkins blogs. I swear I ate a pound of raw vegetables today and I’m sorry I made fun of the tuna dressing. Who is this doctor friend who sells soup! Is this a joke that I will understand when I am at 1% body fat???

So actually other than that Chris O and I are both feeling pretty good and we both lost 5 lbs. I think my problem was that I was making too many different and weird recipes and it’s better to just think of things you already eat that can be modified (which was also a handy way to transition to veganism). So last night we had the Moosewood ratatouille (no oil, canned tomatoes, with added chickpeas) and a sweet potato and a big salad. We had iceberg lettuce because I have bought iceberg lettuce maybe twice in my entire life and I thought it might be exciting. And it sure was.

ratatSo now I just have to think of more things we eat that contain only vegetables and beans and not frosting. For dessert lately we blend a banana, some frozen fruit, and a little bit of soymilk in the food processor. It is quite good and I am sure it will be even more enjoyable when it is not minus a million degrees outside.

frozeI would definitely like to eat a million cookies right now but everyone at work is watching me like a hawk and getting all ready to judge Eat to Live and veganism in one fell swoop and that is actually pretty motivating. Peer pressure does something useful for once after all.

Oh January, how I love you

There’s nothing like January 1st to help me go from none to all. And I am totally at ALL. There is no fat-off at my work, since there are only 6 people in my little teaching unit and I am the only fatty. But I am having a fat-off contest with my sister, although we haven’t decided on a prize yet. So far I am doing very well, I weighed 211.2 lbs on January first and this morning I am down 5.8 pounds to 205.4. I have the chance to exercise 2 hours every day with no child-care conundrums, I can ride my bike 30 minutes each way to work and then I can go to the hour-long masters swim workout at 11 everyday that is about 100 yards from my office. I did at least one of those things every day last week, and 2 days I did both. My goal this week is to do them both every day, although that has been messed up by the furlough day I had to take today. But I did my new Wii Active game tonight, it was quite challenging, so that makes up for it a little bit. It has a very hard inline skating thing that I just cannot figure out, but it is a nice game, I get to watch my fatty avatar make all the movements I am making. And it is very hard to cheat. It is supposed to rain torrentially for the next two days, but I am planning to ride anyway and get soaked.

My eating plan is to eat less junk, more whole grains, and eat more small meals and only when I am hungry. I have done too many limiting-type diets in my life to try one again, I just need to figure out how to eat when I’m hungry and stop before I’m stuffed. I bought Alicia Silverstone’s Kind Diet book and have read most of it. It’s mainly stuff I already know, and she’s pretty reasonable, but she does get kind of kooky with body alkalinity and sea vegetables. Some of the recipes sound good, and I did make some weight-loss tea tonight with million dollar umeboshi plums. I’m sure it does nothing to help weight loss but it didn’t taste terrible.

photo
I have been cooking up a storm lately, I have to get better at taking pictures. Here is a crappy one from my phone since I cant find my camera. Tonight I made the aloo gobi and Swiss chard with caramelized onions from the Vegan Table and brown rice. I have made aloo gobi 3 times now, it is one of my favorite recipes in that book so far. The chard was good, I have never cooked chard before. I have lots of leftovers for lunches, and I still have the 18-step macaroni and cheese, pad see ew, tempeh sloppy joes, and roasted Brussels sprouts in the fridge from this last week of cooking too. I guess I don’t get to cook dinner tomorrow night.

how can we have more kitchen explosions for 2010

It is the end of our second day on Eat To Live. We both feel like we are going to die (perhaps we are DETOXING) so I think we will relax a little from now on…

etl1Here Chris O is sad because he wants to have pancakes and instead he is having fruits, almonds, and oatmeal. This is what we had yesterday. The oatmeal has NO SALT and NO SUGAR. For lunch we had giant salads. For dinner we had little salads and 12-bean soup made in my brand new fancy pressure cooker:

etl2The pressure cooker is AMAZING in its ability to cook beans, but I am not too keen on making soups in there. For one thing, you cannot see what is going on because if you open the lid you will explode. Also it makes vegetables have a weird texture. I think it is doing something weird to them on a molecular level. For example those carrots are very odd now. Maybe they are just overcooked. Also this soup has no salt, as per Dr. Fuhrman. I never thought I cared much about salt but it turns out that I like it. Then we had applesauce with a few raisins for dessert even though dry fruit is FORBIDDEN.

Today we had salt-less tofu scramble for breakfast with a piece of dry whole wheat toast and some grapes. Then we had leftover soup, cut-up vegetables, and oil-free hummus for lunch. Then we had this lentil and potato thing for dinner along with the big salad. It was so ugly that I will not show it. Basically potatoes take way less time than lentils in the pressure cooker so they liquified and it was a total waste of my starchy vegetable of the day. The goal for the rest of the week is not to make gloppy brown things for dinner.

So far we both feel awful (we might be getting colds) so I think we are going to not limit our starchy vegetables and whole grains as much and add back a little olive oil. Perhaps we will also use a bit of salt as having no salt makes me resent the amount of time it takes to cook something that tastes so blechy. But we will still eat our enormous salads (basically I have no choice but to do this since the only vegan thing at lunch is the salad bar, it is just a matter of not loading it up with olives) and we are not going to have any sugar, non-whole grains, or processed items. I definitely see how this diet could work for very overweight unhealthy people and how they would lose weight very quickly. I bet they are pretty unhappy on the third day though. Basically you can eat as much as you want of your salads and vegetables, so you end up eating a ton and then you are really full but then a couple hours later you are hungry again. I find this type of thing very frustrating because I get annoyed at how long it takes to eat a salad and it is all just WASTED. There is just so much CHEWING. And for what?? No caloric usefulness! So I think this is a good diet for people who like to eat in general but personally I think eating is a pain. I only like to eat cookies. And pie.

how can we be more crazy for 2010

Chris O and I are going on a lifestyle change. I ate a million things over Christmas but now I have joined my work “Fat Off” and I had to pay $20. Whoever loses the greatest percentage by February 12th wins all the $20s. My starting weight on Monday was 141.9. That includes all my shoes! But the winner in the last round only lost 4.7%, so I only have to lose 7 lbs! I wish to lose 10. On The Biggest Loser they lose that in five minutes!

Chris O is going on a diet because his Mii is so fat:

DSC_0148Ha haaaaa!

Anyway I think we are going to do the 6-week regimen of Eat to Live. The Eat to Live guy seems like a sell-out based on his recipes which include Butter Buds and how he sells soup on his website for $4.80/can but the diet is supposed to be based on The China Study which sounds to me like it might be a real thing. Basically it is vegan, with limited grains and starchy vegetables (1 cup per day) and fats (1 oz nuts or 2 oz avocado) and unlimited fruits and vegetables. The challenge is going to be cooking things without starting with a giant glug of olive oil like I always do and giving up tofurkey sausages and pancakes. We have ordered the book but it is not here yet so in the mean time we have to eat up all our bad things including our stash of Sweet & Sara S’mores.

Tonight we ate the Tempeh Bolognese from the January Vegetarian Times (only $5 for a year!) (coconut creamer instead of evaporated milk and way less oil) on cauliflower puree.

DSC_0153The point of cauliflower puree is that it is better for you than potatoes, but if you look at the vast majority of recipes on the internets people are all adding butter, heavy cream, and cream cheese. I can’t believe you dummies don’t know why you are so fat! Anyway I just added some Smart Balance. We will wait until official Eat to Live time to see how it is without…

chestnuts roasting in my crummy oven

I made the Veganomicon chestnut and caramelized onion and butternut squash casserole to see if it is any good because I am considering making it for christmas eve dinner.

butternutI thought it was kind of bleh. Maybe I should not be impatient and caramelize the onions more which hello takes way longer than 30 minutes in the oven stupid book. Or maybe I should cut everything into smaller pieces. Maybe I should measure the spices instead of sprinkling them on randomly.

donut disaster

Has anyone made the apple cider donuts from the September Vegetarian Times?

http://www.vegetariantimes.com/recipes/11081

I made them last weekend and the batter was insanely thick and would not go in the pan and then I added more soymilk and then it turned into a horrible gummy disaster that made me want to pitch the whole mess in the creek. WHY???

 

Meats, begone!